Why did they kick cinderella off the baseball team?

She kept running away from the ball.
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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Who says sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?

A guy who has never been hit with a dictionary.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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Do you know what the Queen's father was called?

King.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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