Why did they kick cinderella off the baseball team?

She kept running away from the ball.
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three, One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.
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What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombonist's arm?

A tattoo.

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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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What did the judge say to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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