Why did Venus have to get an air conditioner?

Because Mercury moved in.
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Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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What's brown and looks really good on a lawyer?

A Doberman.
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Where do you learn to make banana splits?

In sundae school.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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How many WASPs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Silly, WASPs don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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