Why didn't the girl take the bus home?

Because her mom would make her take it back.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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How many supply-siders does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The darkness will cause the bulb to change by itself.
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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