Why didn't the girl take the bus home?

Because her mom would make her take it back.
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What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?

A stick.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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