Why didn't the girl take the bus home?

Because her mom would make her take it back.
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.
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