Why didn't the rooster cross the road?

Because it was chicken.
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung.

The guardians of the galaxy!
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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How many TV comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to say "Sock it to Me." (Notes: Sock it = Socket. Also, for the infant readers among you, this was a popular catch-phrase from "Laugh In.")
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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