Why didn't the rooster cross the road?

Because it was chicken.
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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute?

A prostitute will stop screwing you when you're dead.
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What two things can you not have for breakfast?

Lunch and dinner.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Snow.
Snow who?

Snowbody!
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