Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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How many apples grow on a tree?

All of them.
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What do you give a lemon in distress?

Lemonade.
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Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!

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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.

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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, provided there is a programmer around to explain how to do it.

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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.

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