Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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What do you call a cow that's just given birth?

[De-Calf-Inated]
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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What do you give a sick bird?

Tweetment.
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