Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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How many WASPs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Silly, WASPs don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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What does the toast wear to bed?

Jammies!
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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