Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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