Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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Three people were in a boat. They all fell off. Only two people ended up with wet hair. Why didn't the other person's hair get wet?

Because he was bald!
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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