Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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