Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What can you put in a barrel to make it lighter?

Holes.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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Why does the Easter Bunny have a shiny nose?

His powder puff is on the wrong end.
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