Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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