Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!
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What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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How many agnostics does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Agnostics question whether electricity really exists.
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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