Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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How many Mensans does it take to tell Mensa light bulb jokes?

Five. One to tell the joke and one to get it.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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What does the winner of the race lose?

His breath.
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What has legs but doesn't walk?

A bed.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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