Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?

When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.
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