Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?

New Jersey got to pick first.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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