Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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