Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals

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What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?

When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky

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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!

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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!

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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...

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