Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung.

The guardians of the galaxy!
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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