Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!
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What has a bed that you can't sleep in?

A river.
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Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?

She wanted to see a butterfly.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.
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How does the ocean say hello?

It waves.
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