Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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What would you call a humorous knee?

Fun-ny!
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Why did God make snakes just before lawyers?

To practice.
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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