Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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What do you call a chicken in the 1960's?

A funky chicken.
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What did the one penny say to the other penny?

We make perfect cents.
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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What do you call a fat pumpkin?

A plumpkin.
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