Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?

Owlgebra
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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Why did Venus have to get an air conditioner?

Because Mercury moved in.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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