Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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Two girls were born on the same day, same year, same parents, except they are not twins. Explain:

They are triplets.
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