Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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Why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill?

It ran out of juice!
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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