Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks.

They charged one - and let the other one off.

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