Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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What are pirate's favoite treat?

Chips AHOY!!
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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