Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!

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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine

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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.

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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit

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How many U.S marines does it take to screw in a light bulb?

50. One to screw in the light bulb and the remaining 49 to guard him .

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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs

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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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