Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?

A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.
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What do Michael Jackson and x-boxs have in common?

They're both plastic and little boys turn them on.
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How many [ethnics] does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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