Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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Why did the rooster cross the road?

To prove he wasn't a chicken!
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.
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