Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None 'o yo' fuckin' business!
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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What did one tooth say to the other tooth?

The dentist is taking me out tonight.
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How many running-dog lackeys of the bourgeoisie does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to exploit the proletariat, and one to control the means of production!
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Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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Why did Lil Wayne go to the Doctor?

He was feeling a Lil Weezy

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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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