Why do hummingbirds hum?

Because they don't know the words.
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Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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How are an apple and a lawyer alike?

They both look good hanging from a tree.
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What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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