Why do hummingbirds hum?

Because they don't know the words.

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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut

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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.

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What kind of flower has lips?

Two-lips!
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.

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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison

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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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