Why do hummingbirds hum?

Because they don't know the words.

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How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.

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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.

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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.

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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.

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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.

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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''

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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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