Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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A lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a trainload of terrapins,

What a turtle disaster

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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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