Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.

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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.

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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.

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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish

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What's the best parting gift?

A comb.
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How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.

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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.

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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.

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