Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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Why were the teacher's eyes crossed?

She couldn't control her pupils.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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