Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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Why did the rooster cross the road?

To prove he wasn't a chicken!
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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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Why did God make snakes just before lawyers?

To practice.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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