Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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What do you call a pig that does karate?

A pork chop.
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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