Why do some people have an instant aversion to banjo players?

It saves time in the long run.

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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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