Why do some people have an instant aversion to banjo players?

It saves time in the long run.

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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What did the baby corn ask the mother corn?

Where is pop corn?
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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How many members of the United Church of Canada does it take to change a light bulb?

How dare you be so intolerant! So what if the light bulb has chosen an alternative light-style?
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.
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