Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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How do locomotives hear?

Through the engineers.
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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A jump-lead walks into a bar.

The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything"
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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Were does a boat go when it is sick?

To the dock.
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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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