Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car
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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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My first girlfriend was a tennis player but she broke my heart.

It was like love meant nothing to her.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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Why did the man take a pencil to bed?

Because he wanted to draw the curtains!
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