Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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How many members of the United Church of Canada does it take to change a light bulb?

How dare you be so intolerant! So what if the light bulb has chosen an alternative light-style?
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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How many junkies does it take to change a light bulb?

Oh wow, is it, like, dark, man?
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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I stayed up all night because I wanted to see where the sun went,

and then it dawned on me.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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