Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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How many [ethnic] gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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How many Einsteins does it take to change a light bulb?

That depends on the speed of the change and the mass of the bulb. Or vice versa, of course. It just might be easier to leave the bulb and change the room. It's all relative.
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What did one flower say to the other flower?

Hey, bud!
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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