Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.

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Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."

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Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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What do you give a lemon in distress?

Lemonade.
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.

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What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.

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