Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?

A drummer

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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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When should you buy a bird?

When it's going cheep!

Did you hear the one about the crow and the telephone pole?
He wanted to make a long distance caw.
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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