Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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I said to this train driver "I want to go to Paris". He said "Eurostar?"

I said, "I've been on telly but I'm no Dean Martin".
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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What did the rug say to the floor?

Don't move, I've got you covered.
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Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Snow.
Snow who?

Snowbody!
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How many orgy attenders does it take to change a lightbulb?

As many as possible, and don't *ask* what they do with the old bulb.
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