Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What kind of jam can you not eat?

A traffic jam.
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How do you tell you're kissing a french horn player?

He/She keeps trying to stick their fist up your butt.

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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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A seal walks into a club...
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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