Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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