Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

You can unscrew a light bulb.
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How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!
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How do you fix a broken brass instrument?

With a Tuba glue.

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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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