Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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The defendant is accused of putting dynamite into a steer.

Abominable! [A Bomb In a Bull]
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How many efficiency experts does it take to replace a light bulb?

None. Efficiency experts replace only dark bulbs.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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How many astronomers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Astronomers prefer the dark.
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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