Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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Know how copper wire was invented?

Two lawyers were fighting over a penny.
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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