Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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I'll call you later.

Don't call me later, call me Dad.
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What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse?

Kitty Perry

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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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