Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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What's brown and looks really good on a lawyer?

A Doberman.
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Where does Friday come before Monday?

In the dictionary.
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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