Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink

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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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Why did the TV cross the road?

Because it wanted to be a flat screen.
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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.

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When should you buy a bird?

When it's going cheep!

Did you hear the one about the crow and the telephone pole?
He wanted to make a long distance caw.

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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.

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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!

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