Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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What are lawyers good for?

They make used car salesmen look good.
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How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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