Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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