Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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What do you call a young army?

Infantry.
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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