Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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