Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?

When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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"Dyslexic man walks into a bra"
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