Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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What do bees do with their honey?

They cell it.
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What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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