Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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Why did they kick cinderella off the baseball team?

She kept running away from the ball.
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How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. It turned itself in.
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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What is only a small box but can weigh over a hundred pounds?

A scale.
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