Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?

He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it

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What has a bed that you can't sleep in?

A river.
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Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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