Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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How do you make Holy water?

Take regular water and just boil the hell out of it.
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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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How many Psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but the bulb has got to really WANT to change.
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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