Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.

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Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. But when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank,

proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it.

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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake

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Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?

She wanted to see a butterfly.

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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!

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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.

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Why did the student eat her homework?

Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.

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