Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?

Got two fives for a ten?
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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