Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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