Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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How do you know when its Michael Jacksons bed time ?

When the big hand touches the little hand
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws?

Outlaws are wanted.
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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How many assholes does it take to change a light bulb?

None; assholes never see the light anyway.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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