Why does cheese look sane?

Because everything else on the plate is crackers.
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What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

You can unscrew a light bulb.
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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