Why does cheese look sane?

Because everything else on the plate is crackers.
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in mud, then cross the road again?

He was a dirty double crosser!
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Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?

If one side has one, the other side has to get one. Once launched, they cannot be recalled. When they land, they screw up everything forever.
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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