Why does cheese look sane?

Because everything else on the plate is crackers.
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What's in the middle of nowhere?

The letter H.
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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What do you call a pig that does karate?

A pork chop.
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?

An envelope.
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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