Why does cheese look sane?

Because everything else on the plate is crackers.
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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.

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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.

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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.

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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them

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