Why does cheese look sane?

Because everything else on the plate is crackers.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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Why did the student eat her homework?

Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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