Why does cheese look sane?

Because everything else on the plate is crackers.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!
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How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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I'm in great mood tonight because the other day I entered a competition and I won a years supply of Marmite

......... one jar.
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How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. He gives it to six Californians, thereby reducing the problem to an earlier joke...

In earlier work, Wiener [1] has shown that one mathematician can change a light bulb.

If k mathematicians can change a light bulb, and if one more simply watches them do it, then k+1 mathematicians will have changed the light bulb.

Therefore, by induction, for all n in the positive integers, n mathematicians can change a light bulb.

Bibliography:

[1] Wiener, Matthew P., <11485@ucbvax>, Re: YALBJ, 1986
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Why don't honest people need beds?

They don't lie.
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What' the difference between a lawyer and a boxing referee?

A boxing referee doesn't get paid more for a longer fight.
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How many Mensans does it take to tell Mensa light bulb jokes?

Five. One to tell the joke and one to get it.
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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