Why does cheese look sane?

Because everything else on the plate is crackers.
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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How much does a hipster weigh?

An instagram.
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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Why does the law society prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients?

To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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What was the farmer doing on the other side of the road?

He was catching all the chickens!
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How do you fix a broken vegetable?

With tomato paste.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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