Why does cheese look sane?

Because everything else on the plate is crackers.
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What did the clock do after it ate?

It went back four seconds!
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What did the pencil say to the paper?

I dot my i's on you!
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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How many BBS jokers does it take to tell yet another LBJ?

1,622. One to tell the original joke, and the rest to submit give some minor variation of it! For example:
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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