Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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What breakfast cereal does Frosty the Snowman eat?

Snowflakes.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute?

A prostitute will stop screwing you when you're dead.
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What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

You can unscrew a light bulb.
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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