Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year

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How many socialists does it take to change a light bulb?

One to petition the Ministry of Light for a bulb, 50 to establish the state production quota, 200 militia to force the factory unions to allow production of the bulb, and one to surreptitiously dial an "800" number to order an American light bulb.

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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.

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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow

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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops

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