Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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What does cheese like to drink?

Morbier
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What's the definition of perfect pitch?

When you toss a banjo in the garbage and it hits an accordion.

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