Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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What do you call a musician with a college degree?

Night manager at McDonalds

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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.

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What did the rug say to the floor?

Don't move, I've got you covered.

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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.

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How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.

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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.

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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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