Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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How many Feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That's not funny!!!
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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