Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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What kind of dress can't be worn?

Address.
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How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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How many supply-siders does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The darkness will cause the bulb to change by itself.
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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