Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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Three people were in a boat. They all fell off. Only two people ended up with wet hair. Why didn't the other person's hair get wet?

Because he was bald!
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How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What two things can you not have for breakfast?

Lunch and dinner.
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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