Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?

A stick.
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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