Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

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