Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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