Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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What did one tooth say to the other tooth?

The dentist is taking me out tonight.
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws?

Outlaws are wanted.
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?

Got two fives for a ten?
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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