Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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