Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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What do you call a Disney Princess that supports Donald Trump?

Snow White Supremacist.
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How many Stanford professors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One to write a paper claiming that light is a pig whitey invention, one to organize a Darkness Studies program, and one hundred to protest the Diablo Canyon Nuclear Generating Station.
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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