Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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What kind of table has no legs.

A multiplication table.
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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PMS jokes are not funny...

[Period]
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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