Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. They don't like to share the spotlight.
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. He gives it to six Californians, thereby reducing the problem to an earlier joke...

In earlier work, Wiener [1] has shown that one mathematician can change a light bulb.

If k mathematicians can change a light bulb, and if one more simply watches them do it, then k+1 mathematicians will have changed the light bulb.

Therefore, by induction, for all n in the positive integers, n mathematicians can change a light bulb.

Bibliography:

[1] Wiener, Matthew P., <11485@ucbvax>, Re: YALBJ, 1986
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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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