Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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What do a baker and a millionaire have in common?

They are both rolling in the dough!
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I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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