Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?

Nearly unanswerable, since the one who tries to change it usually drops it, and the others call for a planning session.

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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom

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Why didn't the rooster cross the road?

Because it was chicken.

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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.

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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.

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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.

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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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