Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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What do Michael Jackson and Malt Whiskey have in common?

They both come in tots.
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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