Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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