Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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What is at the end of everything?

The letter G.
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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three, One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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