Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be baygulls!
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How does a pig go to hospital?

In a hambulance.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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