Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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A sandwich walks into a bar.

The barman says "Sorry we don't serve food in here"

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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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