Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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What robs you while you're in the bathtub?

A robber ducky.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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What did the ceiling say to the chandelier?

You're the only bright spot in my life.
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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