Why does the Easter Bunny have a shiny nose?

His powder puff is on the wrong end.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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How many Ukrainians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, because people who glow in the dark don't need light bulbs.

Note: Topical to the Chernobyl Reactor disaster of 1984.
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What's the difference between an accountant and a lawyer?

Accountants know they're boring.
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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What did Tennessee?

The same thing Arkansas.
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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What does a lawyer get when you give him Viagra?

Taller
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What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws?

Outlaws are wanted.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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