Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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I'm sorry we can't let the elephants back into the public pool.

They keep dropping their trunks.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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Why is slippery ice like music?

If you don't C sharp - you'll B flat!

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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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