Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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I was having dinner with Garry Kasporov (world chess champion) and there was a check tablecloth.

It took him two hours to pass me the salt.
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What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car
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What did the clock do after it ate?

It went back four seconds!
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I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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