Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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How do you make a fire with two sticks?

Make sure one is a match!

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What's a royal pardon?

It's what the queen says after she burps.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.

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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos

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