Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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