Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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What has four wheels and flies?

A garbage truck.
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What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

You can unscrew a light bulb.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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What do planets like to read?

Comet books!
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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