Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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