Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?

A Moo-sician!

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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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