Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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What clothes does a house wear?

Address.
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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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