Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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Who makes the best cake on a baseball team?

The batter.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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