Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!

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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?

Skeet.
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How many TV comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to say "Sock it to Me." (Notes: Sock it = Socket. Also, for the infant readers among you, this was a popular catch-phrase from "Laugh In.")

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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"

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What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombonist's arm?

A tattoo.

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How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.

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