Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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What do you call a belt made out of watches?

A waist of time!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.
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What letter can you drink?

T (tea)
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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How many Ukrainians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, because people who glow in the dark don't need light bulbs.

Note: Topical to the Chernobyl Reactor disaster of 1984.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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When can't you see a cheese?

When it's pasteurised...
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