Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?

Cut the rope.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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