Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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