Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!

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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis

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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.

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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark

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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.

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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.

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