Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!

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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.

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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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How do you make a rock float?

Put it in a glass with some ice cream and root beer.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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