Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100?
Your Honor.
What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50

Senator.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car
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What has legs but doesn't walk?

A bed.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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