Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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