Why don't honest people need beds?

They don't lie.
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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How many IBM PC owners does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but she/he'll have to go out and buy the light bulb adaptor card first, which is extra.
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?

After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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What is only a small box but can weigh over a hundred pounds?

A scale.
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What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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