Why don't honest people need beds?

They don't lie.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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What did the ceiling say to the chandelier?

You're the only bright spot in my life.
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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