Why don't honest people need beds?

They don't lie.
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Which search engine is popular amongst mice?

Ask Cheese.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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How do chickens get strong?

Egg-cersize.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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