Why don't honest people need beds?

They don't lie.
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How many charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to cast the bulb into the outer darkness, and two to catch it when it falls.

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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.

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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon


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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.

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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated

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What do you call a Disney Princess that supports Donald Trump?

Snow White Supremacist.
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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