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Why don't honest people need beds?
They don't lie.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?
Stuck
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Why does a dog wag its tail?
Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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Why do pandas like old movies?
Because they are black and white.
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Why was the math book sad?
It had too many problems.
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What did the ceiling say to the chandelier?
You're the only bright spot in my life.
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?
Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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How does a penguin build it's house?
Igloos it together.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?
Five after one.
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What did the dog say to the flea?
Stop bugging me
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