Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull?

Lipstick.
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What kind of driver has no arms or legs?

A screwdriver.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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