Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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