Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What do you call a cow with three legs?

Lean beef.
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Four fonts walk into a bar

the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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