Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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What kind of dress can't be worn?

Address.
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What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung.

The guardians of the galaxy!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute?

A prostitute will stop screwing you when you're dead.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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How many [ethnics] does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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