Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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How many folk singers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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What country makes you shiver?

Chile.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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What do bees do with their honey?

They cell it.
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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