Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What do you call a Disney Princess that supports Donald Trump?

Snow White Supremacist.
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I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'Have you got anything for wind?'

So he gave me a kite.

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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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