Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.

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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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What has legs but doesn't walk?

A bed.

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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow

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How many record producers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two… one to tell the engineer to do it, the other to say "I don't know, what do you think?"

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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.

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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.


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