Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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How many supply-siders does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The darkness will cause the bulb to change by itself.
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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Two girls were born on the same day, same year, same parents, except they are not twins. Explain:

They are triplets.
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg.
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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