Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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How does an Eskimo stick his house together?

With igloo!
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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Why don't honest people need beds?

They don't lie.
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