Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
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Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green Green Grass of Home'. He said: 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome'. 'Is it common?'I asked.

'It's not unusual' he replied.

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Why did a boy thow a clock out the window?

To see time fly.
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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