Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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What is at the end of everything?

The letter G.
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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Where is a rabbit's favorite place to eat?

Ihop
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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