Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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How many Italians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I dunno exactly, but my brother's girlfriend's father's boss's secretary's sister's next-door neighbors' priest's cousin's union shop steward's uncle's Knights Of Columbus club Sergeant-of-Arms's nephew's best friend did it real cheap for me once.
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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Why did the farmer wear one boot to town?

Because he heard there would be a 50% chance of snow!
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