Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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