Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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What do you call a song sung in an automobile?

A cartoon.
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What is a spaceman's favorite chocolate?

A marsbar!
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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