Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate 9.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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How many socialists does it take to change a light bulb?

One to petition the Ministry of Light for a bulb, 50 to establish the state production quota, 200 militia to force the factory unions to allow production of the bulb, and one to surreptitiously dial an "800" number to order an American light bulb.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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