Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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What is the difference between a guitarist and a Savings Bond?

Eventually a Savings Bond will mature and earn money!

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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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What did the necktie say to the hat?

You go on ahead. I'll hang around for a while.
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Why don't honest people need beds?

They don't lie.
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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