Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. They don't like to share the spotlight.
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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