Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to screw it most of the way in and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.
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How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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