Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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What does cheese like to drink?

Morbier
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?

A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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