Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.
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"Dyslexic man walks into a bra"
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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Why did Lil Wayne go to the Doctor?

He was feeling a Lil Weezy

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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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