Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?

Skeet.
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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Why don't honest people need beds?

They don't lie.
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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