Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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Why did the man take a pencil to bed?

Because he wanted to draw the curtains!
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