Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!
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What do bees do with their honey?

They cell it.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle?

The vacuum cleaner has the dirt bag on the inside.
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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What day of the week tastes the best?

Sunday!
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