Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What is an astronauts favorite key on the keyboard?

The space bar!
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A newspaper!
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How many Einsteins does it take to change a light bulb?

That depends on the speed of the change and the mass of the bulb. Or vice versa, of course. It just might be easier to leave the bulb and change the room. It's all relative.
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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?

You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.

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