Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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What do you call a snowman in the desert?

A puddle!
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.

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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.

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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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