Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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