Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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