Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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What's the one thing that never works when it's fixed?

A jury.
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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What 7 letters did Lizzy say when she opened the refrigerator and found it empty?

O I C U R M T
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What do you call a fat pumpkin?

A plumpkin.
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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I stayed up all night because I wanted to see where the sun went,

and then it dawned on me.
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What do you call a Disney Princess that supports Donald Trump?

Snow White Supremacist.
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