Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.

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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.

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How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.

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What kind of driver has no arms or legs?

A screwdriver.
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.

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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.

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Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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