Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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