Why is slippery ice like music?

If you don't C sharp - you'll B flat!

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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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Why don't honest people need beds?

They don't lie.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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Why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill?

It ran out of juice!
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Why did the tomato blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing!
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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