Why is slippery ice like music?

If you don't C sharp - you'll B flat!

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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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What do you call a fat pumpkin?

A plumpkin.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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How many supporters of George W. Bush does it take to change a light bulb?

None. First, denounce the nearest Democrats as liberal pantywaists who deliberately caused the bulb to blow. Second, announce that the Bush administration has proved that the science of electricity is faulty, so no action ever needs to be taken on global light change. Third, keep the need for a new light bulb strictly secret. Fourth, use the money for new light bulbs as an excuse for another tax cut for Bush's wealthy friends. Fifth, explain that you would never "disassemble" about the need for light, you are way too busy spreading freedom and democracy in the Middle East by eliminating freedom and democracy in the United States.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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