Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull?

Lipstick.
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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