Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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How do you open the great lakes?

With the Florida Keys.
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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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What did one tooth say to the other tooth?

The dentist is taking me out tonight.
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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