Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to screw it most of the way in and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.
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What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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