Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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How many teamsters does it take to change a light bulb?

``Twelve. Ya got a problem with that?''
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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