Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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How do you open the great lakes?

With the Florida Keys.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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How many teenage girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, but she'll be on the phone for five hours telling all her friends about it.
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