Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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