Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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