Why is the French horn the most divine instrument?

Man blows into it, but God only knows what comes out

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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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What can you hold without using your hands?

Your breath!
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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What did the snowman say to the customer?

Have an ice day!
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How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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