Why is the French horn the most divine instrument?

Man blows into it, but God only knows what comes out

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How many ``pro-lifers'' does it take to change a light bulb?

6: 2 to screw in the bulb and 4 to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.

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I'm sorry we can't let the elephants back into the public pool.

They keep dropping their trunks.
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."

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