Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.
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What kind of lights did Noah have on the ark?

Flood lights!
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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