Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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Middle C, E-Flat and G walk into a bar.

Sorry, says the barman, we don't serve minors.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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