Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!

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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.

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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish

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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky

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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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