Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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