Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!

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What did the clock do after it ate?

It went back four seconds!
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!

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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!

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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck

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