Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate 9.
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Why did the melon jump into the lake?

It wanted to be a watermelon.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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Why did the tree get a computer?

To log on.
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How do you make Holy water?

Take regular water and just boil the hell out of it.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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That girl said she knew me from the vegitarian club,

but I'd never seen herbivore [her before]
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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