Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate 9.
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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What's the one thing that never works when it's fixed?

A jury.
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What happened when the monster ate the electric company?

He was in shock for a week.
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