Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate 9.
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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