Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate 9.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What did one tooth say to the other tooth?

The dentist is taking me out tonight.
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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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What did the boat say to the pier?

What's up, dock?
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