Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate 9.
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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The oddly pleasant feeling of looking down on a physist as they drink the last of their beer.

The strange charm of a top down bottoms up.
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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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What do you call the king of vegetables?

Elvis Parsley.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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