Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate 9.
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.

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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.

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Why didn't the rooster cross the road?

Because it was chicken.

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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper

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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis

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How do you get a trombonist off of your porch?

Pay him for the pizza

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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.

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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.

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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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