Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate 9.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?

He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it

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What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?

Not enough sand.
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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Why did the belt go to jail?

It held up a pair of pants.
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What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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