Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate 9.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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Were does a boat go when it is sick?

To the dock.
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What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

In the piano!

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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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