Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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What do Michael Jackson and Malt Whiskey have in common?

They both come in tots.
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What did the light bulb say to its mother?

I wuv you watts and watts.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin!
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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