Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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