Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. It turned itself in.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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What's the difference between a tick and a lawyer?

The tick falls off when you are dead.
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How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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How do you make Holy water?

Take regular water and just boil the hell out of it.
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