Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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How many Marxists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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