Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.
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What kind of potato chips fly?

Plane ones.
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