Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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What kind of jam can you not eat?

A traffic jam.
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How many supporters of George W. Bush does it take to change a light bulb?

None. First, denounce the nearest Democrats as liberal pantywaists who deliberately caused the bulb to blow. Second, announce that the Bush administration has proved that the science of electricity is faulty, so no action ever needs to be taken on global light change. Third, keep the need for a new light bulb strictly secret. Fourth, use the money for new light bulbs as an excuse for another tax cut for Bush's wealthy friends. Fifth, explain that you would never "disassemble" about the need for light, you are way too busy spreading freedom and democracy in the Middle East by eliminating freedom and democracy in the United States.
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Why was the baseball player arrested in the middle of the game?

He was caught stealing second base.
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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What do you get if Bach falls off a horse but has the courage to get on again and continue riding?

Bach in the saddle again.

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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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How many database people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: one to write the light bulb removal program, one to write the light bulb insertion program, and one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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