Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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How many supporters of George W. Bush does it take to change a light bulb?

None. First, denounce the nearest Democrats as liberal pantywaists who deliberately caused the bulb to blow. Second, announce that the Bush administration has proved that the science of electricity is faulty, so no action ever needs to be taken on global light change. Third, keep the need for a new light bulb strictly secret. Fourth, use the money for new light bulbs as an excuse for another tax cut for Bush's wealthy friends. Fifth, explain that you would never "disassemble" about the need for light, you are way too busy spreading freedom and democracy in the Middle East by eliminating freedom and democracy in the United States.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What is the difference between a fly and superman?

Superman can fly, but a fly cannot superman!
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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