Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .
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I'll call you later.

Don't call me later, call me Dad.
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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