Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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Why did the belt go to jail?

It held up a pair of pants.
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.
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How many Californians does it take to change a light bulb?

Six. One to turn the bulb, one for support, and four to relate to the experience.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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