Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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How do you make a fire with two sticks?

Make sure one is a match!
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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