Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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How many record producers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two… one to tell the engineer to do it, the other to say "I don't know, what do you think?"

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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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