Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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